Well, I say it every time, but I really hope I am actually back this time. Lots of things have gone on since the last time I blogged, but I am hoping a new year will bring new commitment to the blog and myself in general. I'll get right down to my nitty-gritty question/ thought that I had today because it is proving to be a nagging thought that may be a possible solution to something I beat myself up over all the time.
If you have read my blog, you will know that last summer I did a Bible study that really got me focused on spending my time with God every single day and really had me focusing myself in some new spiritual directions. With fall came school for the kiddos, more babysitting crises, and a much busier schedule for all of us. Since we were doing this basically from scratch this year due to Mr. B's new job, it has definitely taken me a lot of getting used to. Somehow that time that I set aside for myself to be with God was not getting done. I had started working out and was beginning to lose some weight, and it became a choice of one or the other. Now, I know some of you are thinking that there is no way that I couldn't do both, but work with me for a minute. Everything was going great working out (I picked that because until my body becomes His temple, then I am not truly living his way in the first place) and I got bronchitis. Several steroids, and steroid shots in the shoulder later, I am ballooned back up to the heaviest I have ever been and looking down the barrel of shoulder surgery right before Christmas. I quit everything that wasn't mandatory and kind of sulked my way through the holidays with pain in the shoulder and an annoyance with lots of little things.
That is, until today. I am not a fan of new years resolutions because I don't know of anybody that actually manages to keep them, but I sat here today and started looking at some websites and realized that I don't want to look like this anymore. So, back on the treadmill for me tonight. The best part is that while I was on the treadmill, I had my iPad listening to music. I had tried to find a good treadmill playlist, but couldn't find any that didn't have songs that I hate on them, so I just turned it on TobyMac and got started. Then turned it to Casting Crowns and kept pushing. Then I realized, maybe my best time with God, the time that I can worship and praise him doesn't have to be quiet, in a chair, by myself. Maybe it can be when I am belting out my praises in song to him while doing my best to make my body the temple it is supposed to be. Maybe the reason that I have a hard time sitting and doing a devotion for more than 5 minutes is because I need that music to express myself. It is almost always the music in worship that leads me to the Lord and makes me feel more in tune with Him. Why can't it be the same way at home. I have been trying to make myself fit into the box that others I know have, but tonight, while walking on the treadmill, singing praise to the Lord, and shedding tears of joy, I felt that sense of being that I found during the Bible study last summer.
What do you think? Can your time with the Lord be full of music and exercise or does it have to be quiet and meditative?